Something about marriage and family

[altas]

Last night [May 5, 2006] I have come across with an article about marriage in the newspaper Republika (a conservative newspaper of Indonesia).
There is a hadith stating more or the less like “Those who fear marriage with worries/concerns about financial status are not from my Ummah” (Dailami & Abu Davud).
Man, this was, and still is my main concern; financial status. Although I also worry about the handling/managing the family as well.
Yes, it is true that after a while life is going to loose its taste being bachelor. One will start to feel hat something is wrong with him (and maybe her) self.
One of our senior intellectuals once told me: “Well, maybe you want freedom until you accomplish your dreams before marriage by delaying marriage. Or even by not getting married you might have longer time for these dreams.
“But this will not keep your credibility. [in Turkmen customs] If you marry later than 30, people will accept it strange, questioning about what you did, where you slept at night up to that age. Yet, it might go beyond by subjecting your sincerity and belief and your recognition of holiness of family concept/institution.”
Well, hopefully it won’t take longer to put my career on track.
And yet, in the article there is another hadith states (from what I understood from Bahasa Indonesia) “Marriage is half of Deen*”. Hence, married guys completed half of their beliefs. Therefore, don’t worry about the difficulties of managing a family and rising children.
Thinking of how old their children would be by their parent are 30, I really envy guys already married. And, man did you think how many of us already married [and even counting only those who got married before the graduation]?
These guys made the right choice. Not they only eliminated of possible risks [especially considering the hot weather and social structure of the country where they (did) study], - alhamdulillah- , but also they got motivation, responsibility, maturity [that the game days are over or at least regulated/planned], and many more… And most of them all fulfilled the Sunnah of the Beloved Prophet [pbuh]. May Almighty Bless these young men with their families.
As the Lois [the mother of children] in a family comedy series, ‘Malcolm in the Middle’, once said: “Well, there is nothing you can do about it. You are stick with them [kids]. It is like good curse.”
06.05.2006

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I was listening to Palwan’s song on Magtymguly’s poem, ‘Her Yana’. There was a part
Dörwişlere ýolsuzlugy,
Ýigitlere malsyzlgy,
Hudaý ol aýalsyzlygy,
Görkizmäwer musurmana

Gudraty güýçlini görgün,
Doga kylyp goluň sergin,
Näm berseňem tizräk bergin,
Ygtybar ýokdur bu jana

Once when I was in a wedding, I started to tease little son of newly introduced family. The father of the boy asked, whether I was married. I said:
“Alhamdulillah, not yet.” He replied:
“Did you mean ‘astagfirullah’.” I firmly said:
“No. I am still worried the economical issues.”
“Well, do not worry about that. Rizki [blessings] comes with marriage”
I believe he is right. But still there were people whom I met, were wishing they could married a bit later, after they started their business, or put the career on tracks.
Anyway let me leave things to float by its course. Let’s see what happens.
21.05.2006

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* I don’t like using the word ‘religion’ here. Because ‘religion’ is actually translated as ‘mas-hab’. And ‘deen’ means ‘the way’. [source: http://www.islamtomorrow.com]

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Altas Habar Gullygy we Maglumat Merkezi

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